Blog of a Million Dreams

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Penis Enlargement Breakthrough

Dear Spammer,

You've emailed me tons of times and now I feel like we're friends. After all, who else sends me 5 emails a day with such concern for my physical health?

And, in light of our intimate friendship as demonstrated by the informal title in the subject line of your emails, I feel the need to inform you as to the misdirection of your commuinications.

You see, dear friend, I must let you know that I, in fact, cannot enlarge my penis no matter what magical prescriptions you send my way.

Because, and this must be a surprise to you for surely you'd never presume to guess otherwise, I DON'T HAVE A PENIS!!!!!

Oooh, you've dropped your keyboard...you've skipped a key...you're frozen in disbelief. I know, this must come as quite a shock. But before you jump to any more conclusions (as evidenced by all of your daily email), I haven't lopped said penis off. No, I haven't smeared it in magic disappearing ink. And no, it's not that it's simply so small that I assume others can't see it.

You see, dear friend, I (drumroll please...) am a female. Oh? What does that mean you ask? That means, most intimate caring spammer, that I have a VAGINA not a PENIS and I don't appreciate your ongoing emails suggesting otherwise.

So please, please, keep your penis enlargement breakthroughs to yourself.

Yours,
Cece

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